Finding Johanna

I decided to sleep on my thoughts and do some research for both sides so I could figure out if I am really strongly compelled to be a vegan or if I can find a way to be an ethical meat eater.  According to the Global Animal Partnership their animals are held to a high standard to ensure proper treatment and a good life.  I read through the treatment regulations of every animal HERE  and the main promise is  Step 1: No cages, no crowding  Step 2: Enriched environment  Step 3: Enhanced outdoor access Step  4: Pasture centered Step 5: Animal centered: Bred for outdoors  Step 5+: Animal Centered: Entire life on same farm I would say that I think that is at least a humane way of life for the animal. Is the animal still killed for consumption... yes. Is my problem with eating meat? I can't say that it is because I just had meat yesterday. My problem is with the sever mistreatment of an animal for its meat production. I feel ...

I bought this book “Skinny Bitch” and I really liked it up until the chapter “Dead rotting flesh” which basically talked about the inhumanity of eating animals. It quoted much of the book Slaughterhouse and was the most disturbing scaring thing I have read. What made it worse was I already saw this the day before and thought “Maybe I should be vegetarian!” This book really made me want to be totally Vegan. I don’t know if this feeling will last and it will be really difficult since my husband has no desire to be vegan. I went to the grocery store and felt guilty even looking at the meat case because all I could see were the images from this book. I don’t even want to buy or cook meat for my husband. Deciding not to eat it isn’t the only thing purchasing and cooking it is not good for me either considering the problem with it isn’t just about consumption but more about not buying into the inhumane slaughtering and use of animals. It was really disturbing to eve...

I have not weighed in several weeks. I decided to focus more on habits rather than a number on the scale. BUT I think that may have been a mistake because I feel like I have gained weight. I have also been out of the gym for a few weeks because of illness and being busy. I did yoga and zumba a couple of times, but I feel like I am not working hard enough.  I know that this is a long journey and lately that long road ahead of me has made me lose sight of goals. I am being ridiculous but thats ok because talking through this helps.  These are things that I must stop saying...  JUST REST TODAY ITS OK NOT TO WORK OUT: this does not help me. If I have a legit reason not to work out then thats one thing but sometimes its more just I don't want to. I was working out 5 days a week and now I am lucky to get in 3... EMBARRASSED  ITS OK TO EAT MORE BECAUSE ITS HEALTHY: my portions are getting bigger lately... I need to start focusing on eating slow and thinking abou...

I used to be very obsessed with clothes and shoes - until it wasn't as fun to shop for these things.  I stopped loving the shopping when I never felt cute in anything I tried on OR the only clothes that were really cute in my size were just too expensive. (Which they still are... but thanks to Gwynnie Bee I kind of worked around that a bit. See the end of this post for more on that topic!)  For the last several years I have been a yoga pants t-shirt loving fool- which is comfortable and great. I will never give up on my comfy style BUT ... Since losing 56 pounds I think its important to tap back into my fashion sense and actually try to look presentable in public again.  Yesterday my husband and I went to Longview and while there I made him go with me to TJ Max, Payless, and Target  Lately I have been obsessed with leopard print, rose gold, and boots! (Also purses but I couldn't find a purse I loved that was under $100)  ...

Lets start this post with a confession...  Those of you who follow me on facebook already know this but last night GASP I had alcohol!  I had to do it. If you are a teacher you know what I mean.  Yes its true yesterday was extremely stressful!  I won't go into the details but I had several things yesterday that made me seriously question my job.  Those kind of moments probably should not lead to "Maybe I should have a drink!" but they did... I started with plan A which was to go for a long walk with my husband. That helped a little but it wasn't enough. The beer he ran and got for me WAS.  So yes I cheated on my goal of no alcohol and it wasn't a bachelorette party or wedding it was just a regular old Friday night at home with my husband. I don't really regret this decision because it did help me relax and let go of the stuff that happened at work.  FAST FORWARD TO THIS MORNING  I woke up and it was GORGEOUS ou...